Chapter 6 - I-Messages

This chapter focused on the use of I (personal) statements during expressing feelings in order to minimize hurt feelings from others and counterattacks. These are sometimes referred to as responsibility messages because people are sometimes unaware of their impact on others. The book shows the use of this technique with a couple that are dealing with marital problems. The counselor sets up a scene that typically ends in an argument in order to see how they typically communicate with each other, and then interrupts before they start an argument and asks them to use this technique when talking to each other. I-messages can be used in any situation where there are issues with negative communication or interactions between people. This can help people to take responsibility for their own feelings and thoughts, while also expressing those thoughts to others in a non-confrontational manner so as not to cause an argument. It can also be helpful in situations where a particularly passive person is having difficulty communicating his/her thoughts or feelings to another person. I think that this technique, when used correctly can be helpful in taking responsibility for your own actions and feelings. However, sometimes I feel like sometimes this technique, if not used properly, can end up in an argument anyway due to intentional misinterpretation. It may only work with people who are willing to attempt to see the other person’s side of a given situation.

Chapter 5 - Flagging the Minefield

Chapter five dealt with the applying concepts that clients learned during counseling sessions to future situations that they may encounter. In using the flagging the minefield technique, counselors and clients can mark future situations in which the client has learned to avoid setbacks. The situation in this chapter revolves around parents who are having trouble with a particularly difficult child. The counselor helps the parents identify a situation where they may encounter difficulties with the child, and talks them through the process of using the techniques they learned during their past counseling sessions while solving the possible problem. This technique can be used in a number of situations. Counselors can use this technique with clients who have had past behavioral issues, helping them to identify when they may have a problem and talk them through the process. This can also be applied to clients who have suffered from depression or other low emotional states. I think it is incredibly helpful for clients to be able to identify where they may have problems in “real-life” situations and get help figuring them out before they are actually in the situation. A lot of the time when a person is in a heightened emotional state, it is difficult to remember techniques to handle a particular situation, so I can see how identifying and talking through a difficult situation would help people to remember the problem-solving skills they learned during counseling.

The Miracle Question Technique

This chapter discussed the concept of encouraging clients to imagine a future with no problems and then try to identify how they resolved the problems to get to that result. The miracle question technique forces clients to consider what it is they want (positive), rather than what they do not want (negative), in order to focus clients on a solution rather than the problem. This technique helps clients to form a more concrete idea of what “better” looks like so they will move toward finding a way to define what it is they want. The book uses the miracle question technique in the case of Jesse, who has been referred because of conflicts in his home. The counselor uses the miracle question technique to help move Jesse toward finding a positive way to interact with his parents. I thought that this kind of technique can be very helpful when dealing with a client/student that is particularly negative in their manner of thinking. Because the client may only be focusing on the problem, it may be difficult for them to see a positive solution. This technique moves clients toward a more behavioral-action oriented goal for changing their own behavior and focusing on a more positive outcome (the situation changing for the better).

Chapter 3 - Problem-Free Talk

            Chapter 3 focused on the concept of problem-free talk as another solution-focused technique that is used by counselors in order to establish rapport with their clients during a counseling session.  This technique is used to engage clients in a discussion about the positives in life. This can help the client to become at ease during a counseling session, as well as help the counselor get to know the client in order to identify strengths and resources that can be useful in the future.  The book describes counseling session in which a rocky relationship between Jaylen and her mother exists.  At the beginning of the session, the counselor engages the pair in “problem-free talk” and asks them what has been happening in their lives during the week.

            Problem-free talk can be useful in finding out information about client strengths and abilities that may be useful to the client.  It can be used at the beginning of a counseling session to put clients at ease or it can be used during a session in order to “take a break” from a stressful situation.  However, the counselor must be careful when using it in the middle of a session so as not to seem uncaring to the client.

            I think problem-free talk is incredibly useful for a counselor in establishing a rapport with the client at the beginning of a session and throughout the counseling process.

Chapter 2 - Exceptions

            This chapter focused on the concept of finding “exceptions.”  Exceptions are times when a specific problem is not happening, where a resolution may already be achieved.  The book describes the use of the exceptions technique as applied to a student who is missing a lot of school because he is being bullied.  The counselor helped him to realize that there was a point in the day where the bullying was not happening.  The counselor then pointed out some of the things that the student was doing differently that may have been preventing the bullying from happening during that time. 

            This technique can be used for a variety of situations.  Because this is a solution-focused method, it can be applied to other at-risk youth.  It can also be used for students who are identified as having behavioral issues both in and outside of school.

            I like this technique because it helps to empower clients to take charge of their own lives.  It helps clients to realize that their problems are not constant and that there are things that they can do in order to maximize the relief from their issues.

Chapter 1 - The Scaling Technique

This chapter focused on the use of scaling to help clients put their problems into perspective during counseling sessions.  This technique can help clients to form goals and can also measure progress over multiple counseling sessions.

As I read this chapter I can see how scaling can be useful in a variety of situations during counseling.  During a session, counselors use a scale of 1 to 10 (the actual numbers can vary) in order to find out where the clients rate themselves in a given situation.  In one particular case, scaling was used in order to reduce a client’s catastrophic thinking by measuring one event on a scale from 1 – 10 against another much worse event on a scale of 1 – 10.  This technique was also applied to assess a client’s level of motivation to change, assessment of client’s personal relationships, and suicide assessments.

This chapter presented a number of situations in which scaling was used successfully.  Because of that, I feel that this technique can be very useful in future counseling sessions if used correctly.  I think that this would be particularly helpful in cases where clients may have problems controlling their emotions.  It would help clients to put their emotions into perspective against a specific event and help them reach a healthy balanced emotional state during that same event in the future.